A Collection of Random and Amusing Stories
by The Endeavours
Summary: Includes: Mainly Harry Potter, some Lord of the Rings, Narnia and various movies. Written in an unusual fashion which is sure to leave you questioning our sanity.
1. Whiskers and the Clam Juice

**IMPORTANT! MUST READ! **

**This is not your typical story. It is created in a rather unusual way.**

**The four Endeavours gather together in a circle or other geometric shape. Pieces of paper are handed out, one sheet to each person. Each person writes the beginning of a story. It can be about anything they want, approx. a paragraph long. Then they fold the paper over, so that only the last sentence or so is showing. Then they pass it to the next person in the circle, who must continue the story. All they have to go on is those few lines from the person before them. Then, they fold over their paper so the last sentence is showing, and pass it along. This continues until the stories are finished. You then have four completely illogical (yet hilarious) stories which may or may not have a plot, make sense, keep the same characters (and their genders), or take place in the same universe. **

**Each chapter is a seperate story, and you may read them in any order.**

**The paragraph divisions are not the original divisions a.k.a. each seperate person's part of the story. We divided them up differently so that the story flows a bit better.**

**If you get confused (which you probably will) consult our profile, where we have placed a character guide and a more thorough explaination. Also, you can review and ask us questions, or e-mail us.**

**At the beginning of each chapter we will list any relevant previous knowledge you need to "understand" that particular story. For example, in this chapter, you should probably know about:**

**1. Harry Potter**

Disclaimer: We don't own any characters, places, items, or clam juice from Harry Potter. Sadly. It all belongs to the magnificant J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers.

Once there was a potions Master who enjoyed eating clams. He ate them day and night, hiding his obsession from the students he taught. Then one day, he had a problem…

His dog, Whiskers, was rabid. It also had fleas. Other teachers hated this dog, and he was afraid they would try to kill Whiskers. As the teacher stirred a potion he was very nervous. Poor Whiskers!

Whiskers was so nervous his bladder let go. He saw a knife came down by his ear. He hissed loudly at the mysterious person holding the knife. The sun was setting, and Whiskers, being a black cat snuck away into the dark. The person holding the knife was changing. The potion was wearing off. Whiskers was escaping.

Through the window he jumped, streaking across the ground toward the Whomping Willow. He shot down the tunnel, racing toward the Shrieking Shack. Just as he neared the door into the room, they caught up to him. Quickly he transformed back into a man and whipped out his wand. He pointed it at the tunnel entrance and shouted "Reducto!" bringing it crashing down upon his pursuers.

"Run!" Snape yelled to the others, grabbing the clams and his bib. "I can't let the students see it!" He swooped down the corridor and screamed out another spell, bringing a cauldron crashing down upon the curious Ron and Hermione. "I can see it!" Ron yelled blearily, "The clam juice is all over his mouth!" Snape glared back. He wiped the clam juice off his mouth and continued down the hall, trying to keep the evidence hidden.

But it didn't work! A teacher turned the corner and yelled "What are you doing?" He ran down the corridor and right into a group of student. "Eww! Clam juice!" They said, but he didn't care. He shot spells and curses at the group of people chasing him.

Whiskers loved being an animigus. He changed back into a cat and hid behind the door. The people chasing him ran past, unsure as to what was going on or where Whiskers had gone. Whiskers thought to himself, _those poor muggles._

As he wandered across the sloping grounds, taking in the beauty of the lake, the forbidden forest and the sun set beyond, he thought of his wonderful adventure. Perhaps, some day, he could finish his project and redeem the lives of the poor muggles lives he had left behind. He curled up in his cat form on his tree for a good nights rest.

**We hope you liked it.** **Please, read more! And PLEASE review! PLEASE!**


	2. Centaurs, Unicorns, and Lord Voldemort

**Greetings once again everyone! A HUGE thank you to those of you who were kind enough to review, charmedalanna, ellianna and BlackRosePoison-Orchid! You are our heroes:-)**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Harry Potter**

Disclaimer: The Harry Potter universe is the property of J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers. We don't control anything, but if we did, Sirius, Dumbledore,and the Potters would still be alive, no one (except perhaps Percy, Wormtail, Snape, Voldy and Bellatrix ) would die, and the Endeavous would be attending Hogwarts!

Once there was a boy named Harry Potter. He lived in the forest with the Unicorns and Centaurs. They were very kind to him and he grew wise under their care. There was one thing they would never tell him about, and that was the scar on his forehead. On day a large man came into the woods and told him he was special because of the scar. So Harry left the woods that he had known all his life and the centaurs that took good care of him.

"Good bye!" Harry cried behind him, wiping the tears from his eyes. Then he set out on the journey he had been anticipating since Dumbledore told him how to kill Volde- He Who Must Not Be Named. Harry traveled to the mountain where Voldemort had supposedly made his lair. His suspicions were rewarded as he saw a huge neon lit sign boasting. VOLEDEMORT DOES NOT LIVE HERE! GO AWAY! Harry went in.

"Wow!" said Harry, as he walked in. The entire place was full of dark instruments and weird pictures. It reminded him of Snape's office. Suddenly the entire cave was filled with evil laughter, and Lord Voldemort leaped out of the shadows in front of Harry.

He whipped out his wand, prepared to fight. Suddenly, as Voldemort cast the killing curse, young Harry found himself on the back of a centaur. Other centaurs surrounded Harry, protecting him. The herd of centaurs and unicorns carried him safely back to the woods and away from the killing curse of Lord Voldemort.

Suddenly one of the centaurs tripped and collided with the unicorn carrying Harry. The whole group fell with a loud clatter to the ground. Harry flew off the unicorn's back and smashed head first into a tree. The world went black. When Harry awoke, he was laughing…

In his bed. _Wow_, Harry thought. It had all been a dream. Harry shivered as he remembered Lord Voldemort in his dream. It had seemed so real! Harry lay back down and sighed. He had defeated the Lord Voldemort and done his destiny for the magical world. Now he could live happily in his forest home with the centaurs and unicorns. Lying in a beautiful patch of grass by his unicorn mother, she tickled him softly with her velvet nose.

He suddenly awoke to find himself in the cupboard under the stairs in the Dursley's house. Instead of a unicorn he found a spider crawling across his face.

**If J.K. decides to end the Harry Potter series similar to this, she'll have thousands of crazed fans after her. PLEASE REVIEW!**


	3. Vinny Velociraptor

**We ♥ our reviewers! Mainly dimondflame, the only person other than blueacorn5 to review chapter two! (blueacorn5 doesn't count). Keep it up everyone!**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Harry Potter**

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, Harry Potter and all related stuff belongs to J.K. Rowling, who is apparently going to kill off two more characters in book 7, despite opposition. Oh, and Warner Brothers owns it too.

Millions of years ago when dinosaurs still roamed the earth there lived a large T-rex who never brushed his teeth. His breath smelled like rotting meat and dead things. His friend, Vinny the Velociraptor, stopped playing with him after he smelled his breath. "Oh man, what's that awful smell?" The dinosaurs shrieked.

The dinosaur yelled, and transformed into Professor Sprout! She was really an animigus! "I knew I shouldn't have traveled so far back in time." She said, using her new invention to blast back to the future. Being a dinosaur animigus was her secret-and she hoped no one at Hogwarts would find out.

The only problem was her worst enemy, Sherri Malfoy, knew how to force an animigus to show themselves. The next morning at breakfast the whole school suddenly found themselves eating next to a gigantic dinosaur who breathed fire! She was not just a dinosaur but a fire breathing dragon!

It was Umbridge! Harry screamed and ran for his life. The fire breathing dragon coughed out a ball of fire and engulfed Harry's underwear. "HA! That's for being such an obnoxious student!" she screamed at Harry.

"Yeah, well, at least I'm not an ugly fire breathing dinosaur dragon thing!" Harry yelled back. He hid in a cupboard conveniently located on the castle grounds and tried to control his breathing. Harry's heart stopped as he heard the dragon outside wheeze,

"Hem, hem."

It was Umbridge! The dragon said in a girly voice, "Why are you here?" Harry backed up and saw Umbridge the dragon was guarding hordes of treasure. He REALLY wanted it!

He brought together a group of his evil followers and planned on blocking off the big exits and entrances so the dragon couldn't escape. Little did they know the dragon was not a dragon at all! It was really (character's name) _----(they were confused as to who was the main character at the time)_ the animigus! She could turn into a human or dragon and get out of the smaller ways to find food.

The Death Eaters crept around the cave, ready to attack the "weakened" dragon. Before they could even begin to shoot curses into the large tunnel of the dragon lair, they were surprised to find her right behind them!

"Surprised to see me?" Umbridge laughed evily and spouted fire into the poor students faces. "Ow." Ron said, shocked, and fell to the ground dead.

"NOOOOO!" Harry fell to his knees and cried, overcome by grief. He was so mad! Harry grabbed his wand and yelled the first spell that came to mind. "Rictasempra!" The dragon laughed and giggled and guffawed. Suddenly the curse was lifted!

Umbridge fell to the ground, unconscious, and the dinosaur ran away, back through the time portal and had lunch with his friend Vinny Velociraptor.

**Wow. PLEASE REVIEW!**


	4. The Repetitive Story of Regulus Black

**The Repetitive and Somewhat Unsuccessful Story of Regulus Black**

**Our reviewers are amazing! If YOU reviewed, you'd be amazing too!**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Harry Potter (notice a trend?)**

Disclaimer: As you probably know, Harry Potter does not belong to us. It belongs to J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros.

Regulus Black sneaked into the cave, _he would do this!_ Quietly he paddled across the pond, his silver eyes fixed on his target ahead. He pulled out the locket, this plan would work, he was after all, R.A.B.

Regulus put the locket back into the folds of his cloak and disapperated. He found himself outside of a dark cave. Regulus went inside.

It was eerie inside the dimly lit cave. Regulus found a magical door inside. He went through and found himself facing a deep black lake. Regulus saw something in the middle of the lake – maybe it was the horcrux!

A boat was sitting in the shallows of the water. Regulus smelled a trap. He picked up a stone and threw it into the water. The stone sank and Regulus relaxed a little as he saw the rock didn't burn or smash up. Then a rotting hand reached out of the deep and grabbed the stone, dragging it under. Regulus gulped.

He drew in a deep breath and dived for the stone, shooting spells at the evil inferi. With a large wave of his wand he pulled the stone free. Quickly he swam to the surface. He tossed curses behind him as he made his way out of the cave. He had played his part, now he had only time to get the locket to a safe place till the potion took him.

Regulus limped outside, weak from the potion. "I must destroy the locket." He whispered, getting weaker. He tried to disapperate but couldn't. He slowly blacked out, and the locket slipped out of his hand into the raging sea below.

**Notice how he never even drank the potion? Hence the title. PLEASE REVIEW! (OR ELSE!)**


	5. The London Underground

**Frodo, Bill, Voldemort and the Ring of Power on the London Underground**

**We have a horrible, deadly disease called reviewitis. If you don't review, we'll DIE! So, PLEASE, help us!**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Harry Potter**

**2. Lord of the Rings**

Disclaimer: We don't own Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings. They belong to Warner Brothers, J.K. Rowling, and J.R.R. Tolkien. If we DID own them, we wouldn't abuse our priveledge by writing stories like these.

One day, as Ron was walking to his potions class, he saw a very strange sight. Professor Quirrel was walking across the corridor! "Quirrel!" Ron said in surprise. "I thought you were dead!"

"Well, when Voldemort left me, I was as good as dead." Quirrel smirked, "but your friend Hermione Granger revived me, although she didn't know it, I had hidden my remaining life force in her favorite book, Hogwarts a History, and every time she read its dusty pages, I gained more life. But why am I wasting my time?" Quirrel laughed menacingly. "I want revenge! Where is the ring of power?"

"You will never get it!" Frodo yelled into the palantir. "Sam, HELP!" Sam kicked the heavy round stone out of Frodo's hands.

"He must never get the ring!" shouted Dumbledore.

"Yes," Frodo gasped, "he killed my mom and dad by drowning them!" He felt the scar on his leg, a perfect map of the London underground.

"I will need to use this scar map." Dumbledore said, grabbing a broomstick and setting off. He didn't know how to catch Voldemort, but he knew he would have only one choice, The London Underground!

Frodo galloped though the toll booth on his pony dropping in a few coins as he passed by. He needed to find Voldemort and stop him before the ring of power fell into his hands! The London Underground was crowded and smelly, and Frodo felt a bit out of place being the only one on the subway with a pony.

He constantly referred to his scar for direction while traveling the dark tunnels. "I wish you weren't a pony Bill, and then I wouldn't feel so foolish" said Frodo sadly.

"Oh, but I'm not," the pony replied. Suddenly Frodo found himself not next to his pony Bill, but a long red haired young man with a wand. The man with the long hair was called Bill, just like his pony. "Bill," Frodo said, "You must help me destroy the ring of power!"

"Who are you?" asked Bill. "Who has the ring of power? I'll help you in any way I can."

"Voldemort could!" Frodo cried. "He gets it, and BOOM! No more of both of our worlds." The two crusaders rode the subway until they saw a pair of red eyes.

"Jump!" cried Frodo, and they tumbled out of the train. A wrestling match began, Bill and Voldemort trying to grab the ring of power, Frodo sitting on the side, whimpering.

Suddenly he had an idea! He pulled out his sword Sting, and took off Voldemort's head with one large brave hobbit swipe. Bill pulled his wand off the ground and shot flames at the ring, melting and destroying it for good.

**Wow, were you able to follow that? We never knew Frodo had a scar of the London Underground on his leg, but there you go. PLEASE REVIEW!**


	6. Avenging Greg

**Avenging Greg**

**Thanks a zillion to all our reviewers and loyal fans! Namely, ellianna, ogre, dimondflame, blackrosepoison, and makdragon!**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Voldemort. That's it.**

Disclaimer: (Well, originally we wouldn't have had a disclaimer for this chapter... but you didn't know that.) We don't own Voldemort. He belongs to J.K. Rowling and company. We **do **own Xavier, Greg, the amazing flying technicolor horses, and the Black Knight, however.

Xavier grabbed his sword and touched the tip to his captive's neck. "Don't touch it, "he hissed as the man reached for the knife he had dropped. "We won't let you escape after what you did to Greg."

The prisoner cringed away as the sword moved closer to his neck. "I didn't do it, honest! I'd never kill anyone!" The captive began to wail, but Xavier ignored his pleas. "You killed Greg!" he shouted angrily.

Xavier was crying. Greg had been his best friend. "You don't deserve to live!" he shouted. He could hear his enemy's pleas and claims of being innocent. Now was Xavier's chance to revenge (??) Greg! Now was his chance, his sword drawn. He was ready to kill!

Voldemort popped into the dungeon in a burst of confetti. "Greetings everyone! I know I wasn't in the original version of this story, but I was added so this chapter is no longer a work of original fiction." He smiled at the prisoner. "The characters of this chapter will show up later in true fanfiction, so that's why we included this introductory chapter. I was also responsible for writing report drafts and meeting minutes. Thank you for your time."

Xavier's sword was leaving his enemy's throat; today Greg wouldn't be avenged.

Greg's killer had escaped the encounter, but Xavier would not fail to find the killer of his dear beloved brother. He whipped off his sword and sheathed it. The murderer, The Black Knight, had powerful magic, but Xavier had magic of his own. He gave a piercing whistle from his black bearded lips and a great white stallion flew down to him. As the horse entered the forest he became a dark dappled brown to blend with his surroundings. With the help of his color changing (natural colors for a horse) flying Stallion, Xavier and his sword could now avenge his brother Greg and defeat the Black Knight!

Xavier was very determined. He hopped on his flying horse and set off. It wasn't long before he saw the Black Knight making an evil laugh far below on a mountain top. A single black barbed arrow flew from the Black Knight. It looked like it would miss, but then flew back around and started to follow him. His Stallion changed to blue to match the sky, and the arrow got confused and flew off into space. Xavier knew he had to somehow attack the Black Knight, and now.

He grabbed his sword and jumped onto a horse. Galloping after the Knight, he drew his weapon and yelled after him. "Don't you turn your back on me!" The Black Knight turned and suddenly loosened an arrow at Xavier's cheek. His aim was true. Xavier fell to the ground, blood covering his chain mail. The Black Knight sauntered over and laughed at the sight of the hero in pain. Xavier was just going to die uselessly and Greg would never be avenged! He lunged for his fallen sword and plunged it upwards at the Knight. The evil man fell down, dead, and Greg's death was finally avenged. Xavier lost his vision…

**Is this the end of Xavier? Of Greg? Of the flying technicolor horses? No!** **Oh, wait, I wasn't supposed to tell you. Keep reading our pointless chapters to discover where they appear again!**


	7. Alien Dentists

**Alien Dentists**

**Reviewing is benificial to your health, according to a recent medical study performed by M. T. S. T. So do yourself a favor!**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Harry Potter**

Disclaimer: We do not own the Harry Potter universe. It belongs to J.K. Rowling. We also do not own the white formations inside human mouths. Those belong to the aliens.

Hermione had always considered herself a normal girl. She had normal parents with normal jobs. She was a good student who got great marks. Then one day, a letter arrived. It was mad of parchment and written in green ink. It told her she was not at all normal.

The letter said: _Dear Hermione, you are not normal. You should go to Dumbledore's office. He will explain everything. You are an alien! From: your alien parents from Mars._

Hermione gasped and said in surprise, "Is this a joke?"

McGonagall looked grave. "I am sorry to tell you Miss Granger, but it is true. Your parents are aliens"

"But my parents are dentists! They can't be aliens!"

"Oh, but they are," McGonagall sighed. "Many years ago, the aliens of mars traveled to earth. They were fascinated by the white formations inside the human mouth, so they dedicated their lives to it."

"Are you saying all dentists are aliens?" Hermione squealed. "This must be a joke!"

"I swear they are!" cried Luna who had never trusted anyone with her teeth. Hermione and Harry exchanged glances, Luna really was crazy.

"Well, there's one way to find out," said Hermione quickly, "let's go see Dumbledore."

Harry, Ron and Hermione ran down the halls until they got to Dumbledore's office. They burst inside to find Dumbledore calmly sitting at his desk. "Is it true?" Hermione whimpered, "That my parents are aliens?"

"Yes." said Dumbledore gravely.

Hermione finally accepted what they had been trying to convince her of all along. "Fine, if my parents are aliens, then shouldn't I read their letter!"

"Sure", Harry picked the forgotten piece of paper off the floor and handed it to Hermione. It said: _Dear Earthling daughter…_

"Hey wait!" Hermione thought for a second, "If my parents are aliens, then…that means…"

"You're an alien too? Yes." Dumbledore's eyes twinkled. Hermione screamed.

Her yell woke up Lavender and Parvati and they rushed to the side of her bed and attempted to wake up the dreaming girl. Hermione woke with a start, and dashed from the dorm screaming. Aliens were attacking her! She ran all the way home to her normal parents and normal life. Far away from parchment letters, green ink, aliens and Owls.

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	8. The Adventures of Peter Pettigrew

**The Not-so-in-order Adventures of Peter Pettigrew**

**Dumbledore wants YOU to review this story! (well, he would if he was still living, anyway)**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Harry Potter**

Disclaimer: We own nothing. Except for the clothes on our back. And the cloaks in Snowfoot's basement. Harry Potter and all related characters, places, etc. belong to J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers.

Peter Pettigrew raced down the sewer in his rat from, blood spurting from his recently cut off finger. He couldn't believe it. He had betrayed the Potters and blamed it on Sirius…and now he had no big, powerful friends to protect him. Voldemort was gone.

Peter scampered down the wet tunnel and pondered what he would do. The traitor saw a few rats ahead…maybe he could ask them…

He had to find his master, it was his only hope, and yet it was his terror. Squeakily, he asked each rat he met, how to get out of the city. Soon he found himself with the massive ship rats making his way to Albania. As the ship landed and he got off the ship, a cat suddenly launched out at him!

It was really Professor McGonagall! "Hello." She said.

"McGonagall!" Peter Pettigrew stuttered. "What a surprise to see you!"

"Don't worry, Peter," said McGonagall, "I'm working for Voldemort now too!"

"Good!" Peter heaved a huge sigh of relief. "You know, I'm not sure if I trust you Minerva. You were always part of the Dumbledore crowd."

"Oh, but I turned spy to Voldemort, didn't he tell you?"

"Voldemort is gone." Peter said sadly, "Harry Potter killed him."

"What!" McGonagall cried. I must go find Dumbledore!" She transformed into a cat and streaked out of the room. Peter felt increasingly nervous. What if McGonagall told Dumbledore he was evil? Peter jumped off the desk and squeaked as he hit the ground.

Like a shot, the traitor made his way back to Albania and his master whom he hated. He needed the protection of his powerful Lord so Dumbledore and McGonagall couldn't find him. Only problem was, his old 'friend', Sirius Lee Black knew he was a traitor!

Sirius Black knew Peter Pettigrew was a traitor. He also knew that Peter couldn't get reunited with Voldemort-there would be trouble if he did. So one day, Sirius decided to go looking for Peter the traitor.

In his black dog form, Sirius sniffed out any rat he could find. One look at his inch long teeth caused the poor creatures to tell Sirius exactly where the "Human rat" had gone. Sirius traveled the countryside until he finally came upon a whimpering, nasty looking rat under the care of a boy named Ron...

Sirius pounced at the bed table, trying to dislodge the rat. Peter squeaked and landed upon the boy, Ron's, chest. Sirius transformed back into a man a pulled out his knife.

"AHH!" screamed Ron. Sirius quickly turned away and dashed out of the castle. "Sirius Black!" screamed Ron, pale. And as this happened, Sirius the black dog was running quickly. He had failed…this time.

**McGonagall, a spy for Voldemort? That's new. More interesting stuff you didn't know coming soon. PLEASE REVIEW!**


	9. Harbley

**Harbley**

**Reviews+Endeavours is ♥**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Harry Potter**

Disclaimer: By now I'm sure you know we don't own Harry Potter or anything related, it all belongs to J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers.

Voldemort glared at his unfaithful followers and turned to each with his glowing red eyes. The Death Eaters recoiled as his gaze burned into their guilty conscience.

"None of you came. None of you tried to find me." Voldemort hissed (despite the absence of 's's). His eyes reduced to slits and he picked out his victim. "Harbley!" The man shrank into a low bow. "Yes master?" he quivered.

"Harbley" Voldemort said again. "I have a special mission for you…Go to Hogwarts, disguise yourself, and learn the ways of the enemy…"

"Yes sir." Harbley said, voice quivering. "But I thought Snape was doing that?"

"No, no!" Voldemort laughed. "You will disguise yourself as a student. A _girl _student, Harbley!"

"Fine!" he said. He had to do Lord Voldemort's will. He grumbled to himself, _why did he have to be a girl of all things?_ So that year at Hogwarts a young girl named Harbley entered the school and was sorted into Gryffindor. _Perfect_, 'he' thought, _now I can spy on Harry and his friends for Lord Voldemort!_

Draco placed the imperious curse on Harbley. She would become so useful. However Draco though his job would become boring. He had had fun, completely enjoyed himself actually, while making Harbley embarrass herself while using her as a spy.

Voldemort chuckled as Harbley shuffled over, looking defeated. "I see you weren't successful." He smiled cruelly.

"No" Harbley pouted.

"That's not how you speak to your master, Harbley." Voldemort said in a taunting voice.

"No, master." Harbley said reluctantly.

"You need to be taught some manners." Voldemort said. "So that is why I signed you up for Bob's courtesy school. Have fun, knock yourself out."

Harbley looked shocked. "But master…please no!"

Voldemort waved his wand and Harbley disappeared. It had been a satisfying day.

**Voldemort makes yet another appearance! And, strangely enough, doesn't die in this story! (he does in many others) PLEASE REVIEW!**


	10. One Way to Antarctica

**One Way to Antarctica**

**Just to let everyone who is still enduring these stories know, the more review we get, the faster we update.**

**Previous knowledge needed:**

**1. Harry Potter**

Disclaimer: I am SO sick of writing these! We don't own Harry Potter! We wish we did! J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers get to have fun with all the characters, places and other stuff, not us!

"How on Earth did I get here?" Snape wondered as he looked around his snowy surroundings. Then he noticed the book he was holding. Of course! James, Sirius and Remus had figured how to make a non-returnable portkey! Now he, Severus was stuck in the middle of a cold snowy land with a potions book portkey, thanks to James and his horrid friends.

Severus understood that he deserved this. He knew he should never have cursed Potter and Black to fart every step, or constantly talk in squeaky voices, or force them to crawl everywhere they went. Snape though about it some more and decided it had been worth it. It had been fun. Now Snape just had to figure out how to get off this lonely snow covered island and back to school to curse the Marauders again.

Snape whipped out his wand and conjured a bridge that crossed the icy waters of the lake. He ran across and touched down on the Hogwarts grounds once again. In the distance Snape could see the Marauders basking in the winter sunlight under a leafless oak tree. Snape gripped his wand and prepared to attack.

But the four Marauders were too quick. All four of them pointed their wands at Snape and yelled "Stupefy!"

Snape fell back, knocked out.

"Snape was attacking us." Sirius said in surprise. "I wonder why. What evil is he up to now?" They dragged Snape against the oak tree as he regained consciousness.

"Who are you working with?" James questioned him. "Who told you to attack us Marauders, Snape?"

"No one of course." retorted Snivellus to James. "I do that on my own and I'm going to report you for making a non-returnable portkey to Antarctica!"

"Ha ha ha." the Marauders jeered. "No one will ever believe you, you slimy grease ball!"

Just then they spotted a teacher coming down the hall just as Snape cast a curse. "Severus! How dare you!" yelled Professor Slughorn. So Severus got the bad end of the deal again and was sent to detention.

**Awww, poor Snape. PLEASE REVIEW!**


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